The Grey Necessities
I heard on the radio the other day that in December we only had 6 full hours of sunshine. Thank goodness, I thought I was PMS’ing all December long. Maybe I was, maybe there was a hormonal imbalance. Its always a ‘both and’ situation, with everything.
But wow, was I glad to hear about these 6 hours of sunshine, This way I could finally point the finger somewhere else for a change ;)). Beause yes, I felt it. The lack of vitamin D. I think a lot of people felt it. I have a small clothing boutique in the city of Mechelen. Usually, during holiday season, people are out in droves, gift shopping, strolling, admiring the Christmas lights, soaking in the holiday spirit, and yes- spending money (we say we don’t enjoy spending money, but I don’t know about you guys, I LOVE it).
These days, though, when I look outside my store window. I see grey. Grey skies, a grey atmosphere, and not so many people. During this season, that can feel very isolating, let me tell you. So I started writing.
I Also noticed a lot of sisters —My store’s name is ‘sisters’, so I refer to all my clients as sisters— weren’t feeling it either. They didn’t know what they liked, wanted, or were looking for. They felt insecure about their bodies, or their bodies were just plain sore. My body felt sore too, and instead of blaming my (post- pregnancy) injuries, I blame the weather. Anyways, back to this weather bitch in a second.
People’s batteries were drained. they had trouble finding the right look. And I could feel it. It was hard because my battery was also running on empty.
People were in a mood. One day, I asked a sister if she wanted to try something on, and she replied very firmly: “I will try something on, whenever I feel the need to.” Needless to say, my insecure inner school girl took a hit.
Then there were the sisters coming in with headphones so they wouldn’t have to talk to me. What’s up with that? This is a small boutique, and I get lonely sometimes, so yes— when you come in, you’re going to get talked to.
Anyways, back on topic. People were moody, and that is putting it mildly. I absorbed their bad vibes like a sponge, and my sponge wasn’t drying. I was lost, searching for reasons for this bad energy. Then I heard the ‘lack of sun’ news, and I thought: Aha! This weather is the troublemaker.
We lean on the weather for everything, right? It’s like a boyfriend. We talk about it when it’s good (sunshine). Nag about it when it’s bad (rain), and we’re shocked when it doesn’t do what it said it would. We use it as an excuse to go do things— or not do things — and blame it when things go wrong.
Example:
“No clients today? Must be the weather, right? I wouldn’t go out today either!”
Blaming the weather is easy, especially because we can’t control or fix it. And we shouldn’t try to. What we can do is work on ourselves. We need to be our own sunshine and stop leaning on anything—or anyone—else. (Yes, that includes the boyfriend reference, FYI.) To summarize: I needed to take control over the situation.
So today, I decided to slap on some tanning drops on my face. Of course, one thing led to another, and I was soon applying tanning mousse over my whole body. Honestly, I couldn’t stop. It felt great! And it looked great, might I add.
For a moment, I was back with my besties in Ibiza—minus the hangover (unfortunately).
Cherry on top: I put on some Spanish summer music. Yes, I wish I could blame the weather for that, but nope—it’s just a guilty pleasure of mine.
Life was good, and I was ready to tackle another grey day.
It was 12:30 PM on a grey Thursday and I hadn’t sold anything yet. Of course, that tiny, annoying shitty voice in the back of my head tried to pull me down and drag me back into my not so shiny comfy outfit. And then he told me it was all for nothing.
I flipped it off.
It wasn’t all for nothing.
(Now, I may sound like a strong, empowered woman, but I’m not. I’m just trying really hard, and it takes work. smiling-crying emoji)
I thought I looked good, so I felt good. And in the meantime, I got some effective work done. That was a step forward, and every step forward is a small victory. And every small victory is a cause for celebration! (Shoutout to ‘Victoria’, who once told me that—no joke.)
This morning it was raining a lot and I was in a shitty mood because of ‘school rush drop off’ (can you relate?). During drop off I saw my bestie. She was smiling and happy. And I thought to myself, how can you be smiling right now? I’m cold, had to park a mile away and I had 4 hours of sleep (want to thank my youngest for that, couldn’t halve done it without ‘m). Anyways, you can smell the sarcasm.
I was kind of jealous of her mood. Ridiculous!
Side note: Do you also picture Professor Lupin in Harry Potter when you hear the word “ridiculous”? I do… Sorry for jumping from heel to branch, must be the ADD.
Back to my bestie smiling. I shouldn’t be jealous, because I could do it too, easily. And if I do it long enough, according to scientific studies, it will release endorphins and I will feel happier. and the longer I repeat this, the more I will believe it (!)(?)(!)(??)
I decided to try to do this smiling thing. because the frowning thing… there is literally no win win. the 160 euros anti-aging eye cream I just bought will be for nothing, and I will just have created a fourth permanent frown on my face. My resting bitch face will be more present and my mood more shitty. Can’t have that today. I need to make sisters feel good ! Helping them and you find the right outfit, optically lengthening your legs, make you feel sexy and powerful. Mindful and demure. I got you. At least know that I’m trying really hard to(o)!
Here is some (unsolicited;)) fashion advice for when your weather boyfriend doesn’t meet your standards! Also known as:
The Grey necessities.
(You may already know: we only do style, not trends. Staying timeless is the goal.)
- High waist, wide leg jeans. for extra long legs and a fabulous waist. pair it with a colorful blouse.
- A colorful blouse to boost those endorphins. Certain colors will do that for you! Think of yellow (sun), magenta, and green. When wearing high-waisted jeans, go for a blouse with a slightly oversized fit. Tuck the blouse in nonchalantly to subtly mask your belly, if needed, and show off the length of your legs. This combination is the effortless, nonchalant chic, long-legs look to boost your self-confidence!
- Sleeveless gilets, preferably a bit oversized so you can wear them over a chunky sweater. Also, go for a less classic model. Think of a fun print, accentuated shoulders… something to attract attention and give yourself and others a reason to smile or stare at you.
- chunky sweater. Comfy vibes only
- firm ankle boots for sassyness (and warmth). Sass + warmth = ultimate win.
- Second skin.Perfect for layering under statement pieces. When I’m wearing my statement blouse, I prefer to do it without a gilet or sweater.
Or just wear your second skin solo ;-)
- Statement earrings. the icing on the cake for every outfit. Because even a blue-jeans-white-shirt combo needs flair. Your earrings will save the day, and they always fit!
- Maxi skirt. High-waisted with a split—extra drama, please. Length, preferably to the ground.
- White shirt, Classic, timeless, and elevated with a red lip. Staple necklaces if you want to include something ‘extra’.
- Maxi bag: for carrying your entire life in style (and snacks). For carrying your makeup bag, your summer perfume (whose scent reminds you of that trip to Ibiza—that’s me), lavender aroma oil to calm your nerves, the rocks your kid picked up and dropped in your bag (which you forgot were there, and now you wonder why your bag is heavy as shit)… and last but not least, your imaginary middle finger for moody people.
Remember we’re all in this together!
Bisous!
Katrien